Sounding like her babbling idiot boss on last Sunday’s “60 Minutes,” Betsy DeVos is now a leading contender for the “Trump’s Most Incompetent Cabinet Member” contest at this summer’s Republican “Dumb-Off” to be held in Clueless, Arkansas. Her main competition for the President’s most unfit member is everyone else in the Cabinet.
To try and redeem herself from her “60 Minute” debacle, DeVos sat down for an interview with us.
Us: President Trump seems to have caved in to the NRA, backing away from his proposal to raise the age limit for gun buyers. Do you have any thoughts on this?
DeVoss: I can’t say it any more eloquently than he did, so let me quote the President. “The issue for people who have age and want guns shouldn’t be decided by the fact they have birthday parties with balloons and clowns, some of whom are armed and squirt water recklessly.”
Us: Thanks for clearing that up… How do answer your critics who claim that since you’ve been wealthy your whole life, you can’t understand the problems of poor students?
DeVos: That’s ridiculous. I understand that the poor have many of the same needs as real people. Needs like, air, food and manicures.
Us: I understand that you’re a very religious woman.
DeVoss: That’s right. I can quote from the Bible.
Us: Please, don’t… Let’s move on. How do you feel about a porn star claiming she had sex with the President right after his wife gave birth to their son?
DeVos: The Lord works in mysterious ways, and if he sees fit to send a dirty, salacious and lewd woman with long legs to attend Donald Trump’s sagging loins, then who am I to question that?
Us: After Sunday night, do you feel that your job is safe?
DeVos: Absolutely. I spoke to the President right after the show and he assured me that my job was secure. In fact, he told me that I’m only one of two cabinet members whose job was safe.
Us: Did he mention who the other one was?
DeVoss: Yes. Rex Tillerson.