REPUBLICAN CARING Earlier this week, Donald Trump and Mike Pence, discussed how best to respond to the tragedy in the Carolinas. The President said that if he wasn’t a sociopath, he’d feel badly for the victims because he knows just how wet water can sometimes be. Pence suggested that it would help Trump’s poll … Read more


TRUMP’S CONFIDANT The only people Donald Trump feels comfortable opening up to outside of his family is Sarah Sanders and the many people living in his head, which now include The Village People. He recently summoned Sanders. Sarah entered the Oval Office to find Trump down on one knee. Sanders: Mr. President, why are you … Read more


SOCIAL MISFIT The most commonly asked question throughout history has been, “Where did I leave my car keys?” The second most asked question: “Does your chewing gum lose its flavor on the bedpost overnight?,” and the third most asked is, “Just how big a human failure do you have to be to be President of … Read more